Cup of Tea?

There’s a quote that goes “You’re not going to be everyones cup of tea, and that’s OK”.

I’ve been reminded lately by other people about the first part of this quote, and have to frequently remind myself of the latter.

Just the other day I was at the park with my daughter and came across a few mothers with kids of different ages. Some as young as mine, others older. My daughter loves all kids and was interested in mingling, so I said the casual hello and stood by as the kids sussed each other out. I quickly realised that the other parents didn’t have a single second of interest in small talk, and would prefer a quick awkward smile and to go on ignoring me. I got home and confided in a friend how I felt so judged, especially as I didn’t expect to be judged by this group of women. Perhaps thats my lesson in judging them as ‘open’ myself.

Similarly, i find myself being cast aside by other women who I have met with before so our children could hang out together. The good old ‘Let’s plan a playdate’ offer seems to be overlooked for a neat, casual conversation, and my offer of a catch up goes unanswered. I ask myself whether it’s really worth pushing it, or if I could be just as happy being grateful for the time I have had with them, and moving on to more positive and fulfilling relationships.

SO MANY different thought patterns happen when I feel rejected. Is it because I was wearing ‘activewear’ and they were all earthy? Is it because my child is dressed in Kmart & Best&Less instead of some ‘cool’ expensive brand?  Did I smell? (having just finished an insane Cardio class) Was I hovering? Did I have food in my teeth?
In the end – none of the above matters. What DOES matter, is how I treat myself and how I turn it into a positive so that I don’t end up being too scared to put myself out there and be vulnerable again.

Something happens when you decide to be positive. I’ve found truth in “Be the energy you want to attract”.

For every time I’ve let go of a negative encounter and believed there are going to be better ones, I find that the positivity comes back twofold. I have met amazing women who are just my cup of tea. Women who are kind, positive, strong and refreshing. Women who are striving to better themselves and the lives of those around them. (This is not a friend prerequisite – this is just a kick arse quality.)

Just today I was at the park, minding my own business when an ‘expecting’ couple and their friends with a baby the same age as mine came up to the same slide. They were more than happy to throw their ball to Ruby, help her up the steps of the slide, compare ages of the kids and have a general laugh about parenting. It was so rewarding that having let go of expectations and negativity, that I found so much positivity.

It’s often the little things to you that can be the big things to someone else. The simple act of those people being friendly in the park and having a small chat was enough to make my day. Whereas if I let it, the group of women who perhaps didn’t even realise how they made me feel, could have been enough to ruin my day. Letting go of expectations and being grateful for the little things leads to a much happier life overall.

Perhaps it’s a good idea to be conscious of your small actions. Everyone is going through something that we know nothing about. A smile or a simple hello may not be a big deal to you, but it could be just enough to turn someone else’s day around.